A lesson learned

I just read the funniest story on Liz's blog and it inspired me to come post my own!

You know Jeff and I have been married just over 2 years and there is a LOT of learning to do about each other still. It is pretty common for him to say "must be a southern thing" or "we don't do that up north". I think it is more indicative of us just growing up in different families.

Leading into my story......I grew up playing jokes on people and the people I knew all played jokes on each other. In my house we were always trying to come up with a good joke. We loved to jump out and scare each other, we hid things that would cause a scream. My Mom taught us early how many screams you could get dumping cold water on someone in a hot shower. She also could be found chasing David and I around the house spraying us with a water bottle until we could find a place to baracade ourselves in for protection and find something water filled to fight back with. I apparently passed this on to my boys because they are constantly practicing how to quietly sneak up on someone and love love love to jump out and cause a yell. I can't tell you how many times I have "found" snakes, spiders and mice all in unexpected places (they have some very realistic fakes out there now).

About a year ago, I was washing dishes and accidentally dropped Jeff's favorite paring knife. It fell in such a weird way that the stainless steel blade just broke in half.

He was in the shower so he was clueless about it and I thought to myself....this is too good, I could never plan on this happening but i HAVE to use it! I thought it sounded like fun!

I knew he wouldnt think it was a trick knife because he would recognize the knife right away.

When I was a kid I pulled the prank of sticking it between my fingers with ketchup to fake out my Mom (who pretended to be horrified at my injury).

NOW without thinking much about it, in about 30 seconds time I quickly grabbed the red food color and ran a few drops down my hand and mopped it all up with a towel. I was thinking of how to fool someone who would be expecting it and all the things they would look for. I held the knife pointed down tight against my skin so it would look like it had gone through, pushed the "blood" soaked towel around it and rushed into the bathroom.

I put on my best "im in a lot of pain and trying to stay calm because i'm the Mom" shaky voice and told Jeff "honey, i need you to keep the boys calm and somehow get me to the hospital because i've had a little accident".

He pulls the shower curtain back and while I expected some sort of an "OMG" yell before I said "just kidding!". I was NOT expecting to see the horror on his face as i think his heart might have temporarily stopped beating or to see this big man jumping out of a running shower and ignore the fact that he was naked and covered in suds to start issuing orders like a war time triage soldier.

I was so in shock that he didn't even doubt me for a second that I forgot to say i was kidding. The look on his face when I dropped the broken knife (and time temporarily froze with a mask of horror and shock on his face) was enough to have me running for cover!

The answer to your next question is "yes" I promised him to never ever ever ever play another practical joke on him ever ever ever again. I still feel guilty about it and wish I had taken more than 30 seconds to put it all in motion and take maybe just 10 more seconds to think about the possible heartattack I could have caused (the point he was quick to make)

This has been referrenced from time to time in the last year and always with a reminder from Jeff in his most serious voice that I will NEVER play another joke on him. Imagine MY shock when Travis comes in a couple of days ago to tell me something funny he has just done.

He is already laughing and wants me to sneak in the dining room with him to watch because he just got finished crawling under the dining table (where Jeff was sitting at his laptop) and untied his shoes and tied them to his chair leg.

I can't believe my "ARE YOU CRAZY" wasn't heard throughout the whole house as I tell Travis he better get back in there and sneak better than he ever has before to fix this before Jeff even finds out he thought about it!

(post note: he didn't manage to undo his joke without being found out but because he WAS undoing it he got off light with just a lecture about how he would have felt when Jeff tried to get up and fell and cracked his head open and we had to call 911)

You are right Liz.......not everyone likes it.....who woulda thought?

WE LOVE YOU HONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!